Dark Shadows Review

*Poster for the motion picture "Dark Shadows"*

Dark Shadows is a great example of what not to do in just about every way conceivable for a film, including my approach to watching it. First off, it is probably worth noting that this film stemmed more from Johnny Depp's desire to put a contemporary spin on Dark Shadows more so than it was Tim Burton's desire to work on it; also, the film saw multiple writers before being finished, therefore adding to it's unfortunately haphazard nature. But before I go any further, I just want to note quick that I have decided to write my reviews from my perspective now rather than a neutral, more traditional journalism style perspective; this is after all a blog, and it has only just recently made more sense to me that I in fact 'blog' my point of view rather than write as if I have been doing this for years already, or have any formal education in film (some Art History classes yes, but hardly a qualification for film criticism I'm sure).

*WARNING: This review may contain spoilers*

So I approached this movie as a last resort on a Saturday evening indoors, with the night coming to a close; neither me nor my girlfriend decided we wanted to go to bed yet, and just about nothing else available to watch for free on one of our many movie outlets was of any interest to us that we hadn't already seen. I knew someday I would get around to watching this movie, but had been putting it off for as long as possible given how few good things I had heard about it, and to be fair the film does have it's share of humorous moments. However things take an irreversible turn for the worst about a third of the way through the movie, when it quickly becomes realized that it isn't going to A.) make as much sense as one would hope, and B.) be enjoyable beyond a few brief chuckles. It was hard not to laugh at the movie as it went from an interesting tale of a recently unearthed vampire reconnecting with his kin, to a twisted lifetime style movie about a woman who couldn't get the man she wanted. It is riddled with the most over-abused cliches one could imagine a film of it's ilk be riddled with. It doesn't help that given the creature frenzy going on right now in cinema: i.e. The Twilight Saga, Beautiful Creatures, & every Zombie movie of this millennium so far, that Dark Shadow's has zero originality beyond that of what Tim Burton brings to the table through his directing, and even that originality is compromised through the undying ugliness of the 70's culture fused with blues and purples. Yes, I did say ugliness of the 70's. I'm an 80's person when it comes to retro, and not that I dislike the 70's (I actually credit that decade with birthing some of the greatest music ever written), but the fashion hasn't made a strong and lasting comeback for a reason...it's just doesn't mesh well with anything outside it's own decade.

Where the film's most promising lays deep in just what hurt the rest of the movie too much to bare...the beginning, where we are given a path that clearly hints at a love interest in Bella Heathcote's character Victoria, one of the best cast examples of Burton's signature style with her skeletal figure and dark features like that of a Gothic porcelain doll. She enters into the life of the Collins family as a governess, which after finding out how Depp's character Barnabas Collins has been imprisoned in a casket for 200 years, gives you some fantasy love story to bite on, but as most good vampires will see to it, you won't see this fantasy love story down a good road, as the film sucks all the interest of this love affair out of it's run time in favor of putting Depp front and center and casting aside just about every other actor in favor of the bigger names. Michelle Pfiffer is given way more of a role than necessary, and Grace-Moretz, who can be considered an up and coming star for future Hollywood, has screen time which seems to exist merely for that fact alone. Her character not only feels like a jumbled mutation of young angst and the wasted 70s culture, but also a bad example of both, with *spoilers* a slice of werewolf thrown in. I mean literally sliced in, like, the last fifteen minutes of the film this plot twist is thrown in, assuredly to wake up whoever almost fell asleep in the audience. Forget anyone who already has, they had the right idea when it started. *end spoilers*

Perhaps it wouldn't be so easy to pick on parts of this film if it wasn't for it's level of disappointment. The sophistication and even the humor which it put forth at times was burned even worse by the lack of understanding that occurred somewhere during it's development. Someone clearly had the idea that the film itself didn't need to pay homage to the TV show, but rather fit in with the rest of the gang. Like The Lone Ranger, most younger people these days I'm sure have never heard of Dark Shadows before this movie's release, and just like the Lone Ranger I'm sure this film has much more in common with it's contemporaries rather than the source material it was inspired by. That's an easy and depressing way to get some serious heat from critics as well as spread the word fast that your film may not be worth the price of admission; simply for the fact that it has been a time tested mistake since the blockbuster boom of the 80's. Radical remakes only work when everything experiences a great level of TLC, and the film's vision is shared on a whole by all involved. But then again who am I? I'm no critic, just a big movie fan. I've never seen an episode of Dark Shadows and I've never published anything in an official magazine, book, or publication of any sort. Yet, it doesn't take any of those things to figure out that continuity and logic will please any movie goer despite their taste in film merely for making the experience easier to ingest on a whole. Dark Shadows, does not do this, and on top of a rather confusing script, the cherry on top is the pacing, which is all over the place (so it's really more like a cherry on the side, or maybe even just shy of the glass). Sometimes when you feel that the movie should take a little more time to let a moment settle in, it decides to say "Nope, you've seen this cliche before...so let's just rush this one, done! Onto the next scene!", Then other segments in which it just makes sense to switch gears in order to allow for some time to pass more realistically, are completely overlooked (like an angry mob being instigated by the film's antagonist, and then quickly jumping to them arriving at the Collin's mansion only a minute later in the film instead of taking an extra two or three minutes to work on some character development before the mob arrives).

Perhaps the films strongest weakness though, was in it's choice of villains. Angelique the witch, played by Eva Green couldn't be a sadder -and harder to sympathize with- villain. Perhaps this wouldn't have been a problem had their been so many times in the film were it's alluded to that their romance just might work out...which was nonsensical given earlier plot points. Barnabas could have killed her character many times, instead opting every time to carry on the film much longer than the plot merited. The film tries to make it seem like their is a constant attraction existing between the two, as Angelique is supposedly eternally in love with Barnabas  and Barnabas in return loathes her; yet they make love in perhaps one of the worst and corniest love scenes a movie like this could offer up, after all Angelique put Depp's character through: being buried for over 200 years because he didn't want to be with her. This alone should be reason enough to say no to any intimate encounter. Why would his character have to wrestle so much with such a simple decision? Also, given he was cursed by her into becoming a vampire... oh yeah, and watching his loved one plummet off a cliff under her command; one would see this as a hugely stacked deck against Angelique in the revenge department. It is highly illogical that one would ever, and I mean ever, consider this woman a love interest even after death, even for purely animalistic reasons. Instead the movie makes a chauvinist out of Depp rather than a cat and mouse game of the film between the two. Starting from scratch instead of reworking a script like this one would've clearly been the better route to take at the end of the day, as everything suffers in some way instead, including the audience. 

Lastly, the husband, or whatever he is, of Michelle Pfiffer's character, and Dr. Julia Hoffman, played by Bonam-Carter, really do not need to be in this movie. Burton's wife has an instance in which her character seems necessary to further the plot, but this is quickly undone by taking the burden off her character's murder when Angelique tries to slam the Collins family for every other murder in the movie. Bonam-Carter seems more cast out of favor than necessity in this movie than just about ever other one Burton has placed her in; and the twist at the end with her character after her murder was so strongly hinted at earlier in the film that it's only by pure luck that I almost forgotten about it... actually it was probably due more to bad placement of the twist than for any actual good reason, such as being well written, maybe it was also it's extreme irrelevance that caused me to forget... I don't know. The husband person though, so useless in the film I forget his name, or maybe I never even knew it, was written off from the moment he was placed on screen. He wasn't clued in to Barnabas being a vampire; he cheated on his wife; and lastly when offered an opportunity to either be a good father to his son David, (who character also isn't worth mentioning much in this film), or taking as much money from the family fortune as he wants before leaving forever, he... of course, because this is a bad movie, chooses to leave with little in the way of emotion or care directed at his family, or even at us as the audience.

Basically this movie sucked. Like stated earlier, it's made just about every mistake possible a film could make. It just wasn't a good idea in the first place. A long time ago I used to think that judging a movie based on the poster could tell me whether or not I should see it, fact is, these days that's not a good way to judge. However, I knew from the moment I saw the poster for this movie, given the actors, director, and what I was looking at, the poster said everything I needed to know: mismatched on all levels. Also, Alice Cooper in a Tim Burton film about the Gothic 70's? It feels more like trying to mix Heavy Metal, Austin Powers, and The Nightmare Before Christmas into a musical number with little in the way of consistent direction. Pass on this one if you get the chance, or if you enjoy a bad movie... no, still pass on this one, watch Bogey Creek, or Manos, The Hands of Fate... heck even watch House of Wax if you can, just not this movie.

Check out the Trailer for Dark Shadows Below!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wpWvkFlyl4M

Review Score Card:
Storyline:            Understandable, but headache inducing, very cliche, and immature.
Characters:         Dense, selfish, and tormented; but not in an easy to sympathize way.
Pacing:               Horrible, a constant struggle for the film more so than the plot.
Interest Level:    If you're looking for something to hate on, it will definitely keep your attention.

Overall:               3.5 out of 10 - I've seen worse, but not by much, Dark Shadows
                           sets the bar very low, and is a prime example of a good film gone
                           wrong. For anyone looking to understand the difference between
                           a good film and a bad one in today's contemporary fantasy scene,
                           this is a good... well, subjectively good place to start.

Drive Review

*Poster for the Motion Picture "Drive"*

I've avoided reviewing this film for quite some time now. Mainly because I felt it more relivant to review Ryan Goslings most recent film released to DVD, "A Place Beyond the Pines", and also in small part due to not wanting to capitalize on his current popularity. Truth be told, I am on the Gosling bus, he is a bit of a god right now in cinema, but mainly because he represents more of what makes movies good than bad; something I feel even he has picked up on recently. Also, I've been trying to avoid doing any of my reviews in the first person, however, this would be a more dishonest and less intimate/appropriate review if I chose to take a neutral stance on it...in short: Drive is not a movie that you can't have a personal opinion on, which is part of the reason it is so amazing. This film will polarize viewers on so many levels, either for Gosling alone or for it's choice to be so shamelessly art-house, something that hasn't seen Goslings more recent film with Winding-Refn: "Only God Forgives" fair as well.

*WARNING: There will most likely be spoilers ahead.*

Drive is for all intents and purposes a movie that glorifies every nuance of being an indie film, and it knows it's audience. It relishes in being retro-savvy and sports perhaps one of the best minimalist soundtracks to an overtly minimalist film that any self proclaimed art connoisseur can appreciate with little effort. It strikes a gritty balance between high-brow and low-brow favoring cinematography and hyper violence all at once; splicing shades of blood and gore throughout it's all too short length.  At times this may seem to derail the film, but it adds to the unsettling nature of it's presentation. It is a slick package, almost asking one to forget the film they are watching is for just about every reason: a film about a hero. Few men would take the chance on their love interests main squeeze being recently released from the pen not ending their life for almost starting an affair with her, yet alone befriending this nameless driver to help cure all debts, all in the name of doing the right thing for someone who you can't explain your unrivaled attraction towards. The film even acknowledges the extreme of this; something that shouldn't even be an extreme. We live in a society where if you try and take someones girl, or fall in love with her, you are the enemy, there are no qualms about that, but Drive decides that two men can unite against the tides to do what needs to be done, regardless how grim the cost. By the end of the ordeal, the only justification is death, and our main character, nameless as ever, in some way, whether intended or not, worked out a short in the wires, leveling the field and introducing the tone of the film.

There isn't really much to talk about in terms of plot for Drive, boy meets girl, boy wants to help girl, boy gets mixed up in a bunch of hoopla trying to help the girl, and so on. Don't watch Drive for the story, it really isn't the point. It's not a bad story by any measure, but the movie is meant to be felt, and although I'm not one for any radical style over substance type film that masks imperfections by bombarding the viewer with eye candy, Drive does everything so eloquently, it could've done just that and I would be a willing a victim of it's agenda. Thankfully, Drive is a film that chooses style as a preference merely for the sake of telling the thinly drawn out story more effectively rather than compensating for it's surely short on paper narrative.

Carry Mulligan who plays Gosling's lead's love interest is not without her merritt in this film, and although her character's background is nothing relatively unheard of, the relation she forges with our verbally reserved lead is worth more than just a passing glance. Their relationship is very reliant on physical queues and requires knowledge of social opinion and moral decency. The line they straddle constantly shines a light on the sexual innuendos in their eyes, however they remain blind to the notion as they commit to their own common decencies. This is all the more evident throughout the film as it begins to turn down the dark roads of no return, and we watch supporting cast members "Brian Cranston", "Albert Brooks" and "Ron Pearlmen" moonlight and keep the flavor alive on screen when our challenged protagonists take momentary leave. I can't help but write as if I'm keeping my fingers limber for some unnamed inspired screenplay, but a movie like Drive just brings out your inner poet, and despite some strong opinions against the film, I'm hard pressed to have any coarse words towards it...except for the following:

Drive can feel very forced if you don't know what to expect going into it, or if you're not a film buff (thanks in part to an aggressive anti-artsy DVD marketing period). The movie underwent some serious personality change when it came to getting people to see it in theater or on home video, through both trailers and home video release (something I have very strong feelings towards). I understand that there are expectations placed on sales, and that a films reviews when they are raved weigh heavy on how it's pushed towards the masses, however it has never rested easy with me how Drive was handled upon release for DVD. The box art looks very blatantly action movie fan oriented. This is something I saw with the marketing of Adventureland and one of it's trailers making it seem like another Superbad; a classic case of trying to grab an audience that doesn't exist because no one knows how to market such films to a larger audience, so they gravitate towards the largest common denominator. Case and point: Drive doesn't demand a large audience, and the fortune from it's fame will come through time rather than a three day box office tally or home video release. Much like how I've watched "In Bruges" (one of the greatest films of the last ten years) slowly reach cult status, my expectations of Drive are no different. The movie already has established an amazing impact among the underground for those who revel in it's mission statement, and everyone else who stands a chance of watching it in the future will no doubt discover it in due time. There is no reason to so blatantly exploit it's appeal by trying to lure in viewers who don't have an interest in it to begin with. 
But I digress.

Honestly, another reason I have avoided reviewing this movie is because the politics behind it's appeal overshadow the film itself, which by no means makes it a bad movie, it's just a much better film to experience than talk about. The first five minutes of the film, along with every water cooler moment will give you every indication needed regarding just how amazing the film will be, followed by what is perhaps one of the most unexpectedly memorable introduction sequences set to Kavisky's "Nightcall"; which in my opinion, sets the standard for how all opening credit roll/mood setting intro pieces should be portrayed in all films to follow. There is no doubt in  my mind that every other moment that will stick with you long after the film's end will revolve around the violence that it encapsulates it,  however, it resonates on a whole as an uncompromising experience that anything short of 'aww' should be considered an inappropriate response, if for any reason than because the standard for counter-culture and artsy-fartsy presentation in film has just widened the gap between majestic and malevolent in terms of tech-noir, neo-punk, retro-revival, whatever you want to call it. It's all irrelevant at the end of the day. I know people half my age that have found this movie twice as appealing as me, and it's not through ignorance  it's because it helps to represent where cinema needs to go more than anything else. It's not perfect, but it's not far from it, and my apologies for this not being more of a review as much as a praise session; I think we all have our movies we feel the need to help solider on, and I never want to see the art, music, heart, force, overwhelming style, and inspiration fade that has been provided by such a film as "Drive".

Check out the trailer for Drive below!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CWX34ShfcsE

Review Score Card:
Storyline:            Thin, but unnecessary.
Characters:         More emotion than logic, playing up the hero angle... but triumphantly.
Pacing:               Minimaistic, slow, and thriving on atmosphere.
Interest Level:    Captiviating, a must watch for any film major or movie buff. No exceptions.

Overall:               9.5 out of 10  - It's a staple of everything our times are made of
                           right now in terms of indie flare, and Ryan Goslings finest hour outside
                           a comedy or romance. Watch for sheer inspiration, good or bad.

Seven Psychopaths Review

*Promotional Poster for Seven Psychopaths*

For what it's worth, a film like Seven Psychopaths should be cult status guaranteed in a few years time; however, while an entertaining entry into another world of dark and twisted personas, the movie seems more like a collection of odd and interesting moments held together by a grim plot than a classic title worthy of a second viewing.

*WARNING: There may be spoilers ahead.

Seven Psychopaths is about Marty and his friend Billy. Marty is working on a screenplay, or at least attempting to flesh out the final narrative for a screen play, and his friend Billy spends his time stealing dogs with his partner in crime, Hans. Marty played by Colin Farrell can be seen as the gear that keeps the clock turning in this film, his character anchor's every other events and his inspiration, which should come from everything occurring around him, seems poised to traumatize or even ruin his life more than double as a muse for his writings. The screen play he is currently working on is even more compromised when about half way through the film it is revealed that Hans, a quirky character played by Christopher Walken discloses that Marty's character his screenplay focuses on is in fact based upon his life experiences, as Marty had borrowed the idea from his friend Billy who told him said story in the first place. This takes away all writing credibility from Farrells character, and places the movies interest on the shoulders of it's resident lunatic "Billy" played by Sam Rockwell. 

What should've been the best role Rockwell has ever done in a film, feels like more of a forced and goofy version of every other crazy psychopathic killer to come out of a major Hollywood production; lowering the seriousness of his characters convictions into a raving mad parody for writers of all kinds to indulge in. To say Rockwell's character, and the movie on a whole is aimed towards critics and movie buffs is an understatement. It doesn't sell itself short on originality because of it though, it just does the job in too many different ways. Throw in Woody Harrison as Charlie Costello, the mad man whose dog Billy steals to set the whole films tone, along with Tom Waits being as crazy-eccentric as usual, and you have a full plate that more than needs to shave off some of it's servings.

What hurts this film the worst is the inability to feel any pity for the characters involved, and the screenplay Marty works on is hands down more interesting than the film itself. Christopher Walken puts on one of the best roles he's had in years, only to see it undersold by the rest of the movies gimmick driven story. If you want to laugh at everyone involved, or have a dark and twisted enough sense of humor, the movie would probably be more than an enjoyable watch for you, otherwise, sympathy is hard to come by as virtually no one in the cast has done or does anything that gives you any reason to care, aside from Myra, Han's lover, being killed; which may provide just a shred of sympathy for Hans character, despite his bad deeds and checkered past.

All in all Seven Psychopaths is a decent watch that falls short of many higher expectations set in place by it's great cast and unique premise. Writing a review for this movie isn't easy given it's a complicated, dark, gritty, goofy, twisted, stylistic, almost noir like feature with a broad range of actors, but again, that didn't end up equaling greatness and rather caused the movie itself to buckle under the weight of both expectation and exceptional storytelling. It falls into a newly growing abyss of dark cult comedies and stylish pieces that miss the mark by just enough to be forgotten, yet just loud enough to stick around for a bit. Watch if you like movies of it's nature, otherwise avoid.

Check out the trailer for Seven Psychopaths below!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OOsd5d8IVoA

Review Score Card:

Storyline:            Aggressive, complicated yet simple, drawn out and not very

                           interesting more often than not.

Characters:         Quirky, the driving force behind the film, very hit or miss.

Pacing:               Not good, not bad, too much a mix of too many different ideas.

Interest Level:    Worth a watch if you're into bizarre and unique character driven

                           films; avoid if you don't want to be flabbergasted. 

Overall:               6 out of 10 - Doesn't live up to expectations despite strong buzz,

                           strong performances, but characters can be less likable than 

                           needed given what this unique dark comedy demands.